Archive for May, 2008

As I was watching Betty Blue last night, I thought about Beatrice Dalle (who plays Betty) and how amazing but real her body was. When her lover carresses her breast (which he does often–you truly sense he loves her and her body and sex with her), it is a soft and sexy touch. And this takes me back, again, to the difference of sensual movies and porn movies. Every woman in the porn movie had huge, rock-hard and very fake breasts. At one point, a woman placed a man’s hand on her breast as a gesture of introduction and it was almost ridiculous–as ridiculous as trying to make gripping a rock sexy. Also in Betty Blue, the male lover (played by Jean-Hugues Anglade) is often seen nude, walking comfortably through scenes or sitting at the kitchen table–nice to look at but also perfectly natural. Porn? The man’s penis has to be completely erect and active–heaven forbid we enjoy nudity just for the pleasure of looking at a beautiful if imperfect body. Anyway, enough said and I won’t go back there…at least not for another ten years. Who knows, maybe some day they’ll get it right (as in satisfy women viewers as well as men)–until then, there is always Barefoot Aphrodite!

Realizing it has been about ten years since I last watched a porn movie, I thought it might be time to revisit and see if they or I had changed at all. The long and short of it? No and no. I went where I would send you if you thought our list of sensual films for women was not hot enough: Good Vibrations. Women-focused and fun, it has a great movie section–at least from their descriptions. While I should have probably gone to their “new to porn” section, I opted for “Sex and a Story” and chose “Pirates.” Well, there is a story and there certainly is sex. The problem is that when there is sex, there is no story. Suddenly, any relationship between the characters becomes the same scene, give or take a position, with the same body parts and the same lack of…um, real connection between the characters. Slightly arousing initially, it all becomes rather clinical, boring and even absurd after a short while. It makes me want to go back to Harvey Keitel carressing the hole in Holly Hunter’s stocking in The Piano (note how many reviewers mentioned it). Sometimes less is more. And sometimes more is way, WAY too much.

Remember to not only enjoy sensual films for women but also to let them inspire you. Take Regena Thomashauer, creator of Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts as an example:

“The idea for Mama Gena’s School of Womanly Arts came to me after seeing Jacqueline Bisset in the movie Dangerous Beauty utter these words to her daughter, who she was training to be a courtesan: “In order to give pleasure, you have to know pleasure.” It was a very beautiful scene, set in sixteenth-century Venice. I was captivated by the idea of a gorgeous, sensual mother sharing the secrets of pleasure and sensuality with her daughter. Why, if that had happened to me, I could have hit the ground running after puberty, rather than spend years mired in confusion and misinformation. Imagine having your mom teach you how to enjoy the touch, taste, and smell of kissing your first boy! Or how peeling an orange or eating an asparagus spear can be a method of seduction. Or how your eyes, the windows of your soul, can be used to ignite a flirtation. Imagine having your mama in your corner as you begin your sensual unfolding. How delicious, and how totally unusual.”

Robert Downey Jr. If not sensual movies then definitely sensual characters/performances. “Two Girls and a Guy,” “Ally McBeal,” “Wonder Boys,” and, yes, “Ironman,” just to name a few. Go there–you won’t regret it.

Sensual food for May–enjoy some while you watch May 15’s selection–chocolate dipped strawberries–make your own or try Edible Arrangements (yes, worth the price of delivery).

Love is in the air. So is sensual.

Back from a break from the blog, I think it’s time to take a semi-break from the movies too. Why not apply the sensations stimulated by watching sensual film for women to your day to day? In our first featured film for this month, the character of Frances in “Under the Tuscan Sun” finds joy in creating more and more elaborate meals for her new-found “family” of builders busy transforming her impulse purchase of a decaying estate into a real home. Why not take a page from her book and create a luxurious meal and invite your best of best friends or some new acquaintances and use food as a connection? And while you’re cooking, enjoy the process by focusing on your senses. Here’s a quote from Eva Barash (creator of the DVD “Living Room Yoga”) about using the process of cooking to bring yourself back to the joy of the moment:

“It’s best if what I’m making requires a lot of methodical chopping of vegetables. Chopping takes time and forces me to be in the moment and only in that moment…I am right there and nowhere else as I feel the coolness of the carrots and the sting of the onions or the sound of the sizzling in the pan,” says the yoga teacher and former pastry chef. “Cooking moves at the same pace as our bodies move. It’s a very simple, clear thing–we can understand it. If I slow this down, everything else slows down.” Yoga Journal, December 2007

 So slow down and enjoy!