Archive for the 'Sensuality Talk' Category

Earlier in a blog posting, I mentioned a romantic sensual scene between Jennifer Lopez and George Clooney in Out of Site where they have “a moment” in a deserted bar while fat snowflakes fall outside their window and sleepy, jazzy music plays. Today we are up to two feet in a snowstorm and I can’t think of a more sensual setting. If it is going to be cold, let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. We braved the roads to drive out to some girlfriends’ house in the country and snuggled in to eat good food drink wine and talk the night away. In the morning, we snowshoed out onto the frozen, snow-buried pond and then came back to put wood on the fire and have warm soup for lunch. A barn owl flew up into the trees weighed down in snow and kept us entranced until it flew off into the dark, snow-heavy woods. What a wonderful time. And if you are lucky enough to be with someone you love and make love late in the night with the room still warm from the fire and the blanket of snow all around your cozy home…well, someone needs to capture that sensual scene in a movie. Let me know if you know of one!

For me, this blog is the most unsensual part of the site. Yes, it offers the potentional for a wealth of information and thoughts about sensual films for women but it means I need to sit down in front of a computer and spend some time with a screen and a keyboard. Now that I think of it, there is probably the potential to make even that experience sensual with music, scents or just a general awareness of what is around me.

This morning I had the pleasure of sharing the site through e-mails from visitors. One person noted that the Sensuality Test is not working–the fix is in the works as I write! It’s worth taking if you haven’t yet. Another visitor resuggested the movie “House of Sand” (or, much more sensually, “Casa de Areja”) which I wrote about awhile ago on the blog. I have decided to make it a “Visitor’s Pick” and have the team of reviewers watch it so look for it in the future. It reminded me that another woman who has regular Barefoot Aphrodite movie nights with a group of friends recommended the movie “Bread and Tulips.” Again, look for it as a future Visitor’s Pick.

So this morning the blog has been a little more of a sensual experience just because I had the opportunity to share it with some real women out there. Please keep writing and suggesting films and adding comments to the discussion!

Just a plug for Gail Sheehy’s book “Sex and the Seasoned Woman” in the context of Harold and Maude. Sheehy doesn’t mention this film but Maude could certainly serve as the mascot for all the women in her book as well as the movie reviewers on our site. Speaking of age, it’s interesting that the selection of Harold and Maude as a Barefoot Aphrodite sensual film for women was made by our youngest reviewer!

Tonight I am going to see Bright Star with two girlfriends–I hope it is as good/sensual as I expect it to be!

When I first began this site, I thought the target age group would be about 30 to 65. When I mentioned this in a business workshop, all the women over 60 and under 30 wanted to know why they weren’t included. My thought was that with age came a certain comfort with sensuality and a certain knowledge of what satisfies the self rather than a constant need for affirmation from men and a constant effort to please the male sex at the expense of one’s own pleasures. While age may bring about a certain seasoning, the reaction to my attempt to qualify the need for a sensual source made it obvious that women of any age are open to the search for what can make their world more sensual and sexual.

But there is a certain seasoning that comes with age that definitely can contribute to sensuality. Yesterday I was searching for a quote to begin a new feature on the site called “Sensual Words of the Day.” I was definitely drawn to the films with older characters when I started looking for quotes and, sure enough, I was rewarded with one from one of the oldest sensual characters on our site. Maude, from Harold and Maude, a ripe 79. The quote? Well, I’m tempted to ask you to check back when the new feature is live but here it is:

“A lot of people enjoy being dead. But they are not dead, really. They’re just backing away from life. Reach out. Take a chance. Get hurt even. But play as well as you can. Go team, go! Give me an L. Give me an I. Give me a V. Give me an E. L-I-V-E. LIVE! Otherwise, you got nothing to talk about in the locker room.”
 

I’m not saying it would ever really happen but say you got tired of watching sensual films for women and thought maybe it would be much more sensual to turn off the tv and curl up with a really good book. How would you decide what to read? Well, I would suggest you first curl up with “Between the Sheets: The Book Babes’ Guide to a Woman’s Reading Pleasures” and skip right to the chapter on “Love, Sex and Second Chances.” These women are amazing and will set you right up. And then when you’re done, maybe you can create a “from fiction to film” book club and combine the arts for a truly sensual experience!

For a sensual snippet and a lesson in how to make life sensual, check out Mollly Wizenberg’s description of her trip to wine country in France. It’s so simple but so pleasurable. Her fantasy cocktail party is fun too but picnics in the French countryside will have you in sensual dreamland!

Picnics! Another fun way to enjoy a sensual film–have an indoor picnic while you watch!

It doesn’t take much to create a sensual setting for a movie. It might be as little as dimming the lights. Or it might be as much as creating a whole meal around the theme of the movie, inviting friends and making a Movie Night of it. One simple solution I suggest is sitting down to a movie with a glass of wine or a cocktail. Sometimes you can match it up with the movie such as Chilean wine for an Il Postino viewing or Italian wine from Tuscany for Under the Tuscan Sun. Or just get creative and make your own match. For example, for the Sizzling Chemistry of Out of Sight, try concocting a White Lady. It’s elegant and sexy all at the same time just like the movie. Try it! Make it sensual!

Valentine’s Day–so much potential for the sensual! Need a sensual movie that both You and He will enjoy? Try History of Violence, Y Tu Mama Tambien or Out of Sight. Or, think outside the box and try something a little kinkier like “Secretary” (warning–not everybody’s cup of tea). A movie that is not reviewed on our site but that is sensual in my mind because a tough woman is very sexy is “Long Kiss Goodnight.” Trust me, women and men both seem to enjoy this one! It’s intelligent, funny and sexy with a high body count–how can you go wrong?

 Looking for an unusual gift for a Valentine treat for yourself, a gift for a friend or a special something for your Man? Try one of my favorite sites, Etsy http://www.etsy.com/ – a very hip site where you can buy “all things handmade!” For your Man, check the “Knock His Socks Off” category on the upper left of the homepage.

 Think outside the box–there is nothing more sensual than a new way of looking at things!

Looking for a reason to be grateful for what you have in these hard times? Try tapping into your senses and looking for pleasure in the smaller things in life. A series of studies by psychology professor at UC Davis, Robert Emmons, has found that keeping a written record of what you are grateful for can help a person to sleep longer, exercise more frequently, have fewer health complaints and generally feel better about their lives. (Yoga Journal, Dec 2008)

The article on these studies made me think of how being in touch with your senses helps you to appreciate the simple pleasures in life from the smell of baking bread to the touch of someone’s hand on your skin–that you can choose to be grateful for even the simplest things that surround you day to day or you can ignore them. A perfect sensual movie example of this can be found in the super-sensual character of Maude in “Harold and Maude“ who teaches the the lost and cynical character of Harold that life is about enjoying and being grateful for the sensual. As reviewer Teresa notes: “Harold and Maude addresses the reason we even care about sensuality - that it makes life worth living…required viewing to understand the importance of sensuality.” If you haven’t seen Harold and Maude in a while or at all, sit down and enjoy it. Then take a lesson from Maude and be grateful for what is simple and beautiful in life!

This is not movie related but you could certainly fit in a sensual movie too! There is a great article in More Magazine, Novermber 2008, about eating and shopping your way through Manhattan–Jane Rosenthal (producer, Meet the Parents, Wag the Dog) plans the perfect girlfriends’ getaway! It’s a fun read, good fantasy material, and, hey, if you’re planning a trip to the Big Apple some time soon…!