Barbara

Bio

64, divorced, with three adult sons, English as a Second Language instructor at a private college. Enjoys skiing (downhill and crosscountry), gardening, cooking, knitting, watching movies, shopping, spending time with friends and family..

What I find sensual in relationships: The way couples look at each other—it’s a big indicator how they feel about each other. Handholding, if they’re older especially. The tone of voice—a decent, respectful tone of voice is important to me. Touch, looks, voice. It’s the same thing in movies—how a couple talks to each other, how they look at each other—it makes my stomach go funny.

What in my life has influenced me most sensually: Growing up on a dairy farm gave me a real appreciation for land. I used to take long walks and learned to love walking. I used to pound rocks to dust and now I love rocks. I used to play by myself outdoors for hours.

Several people have influenced me sensually. My friend Nadine’s mother is a really talented woman. She had a magic touch—she could turn junk into treasure. She could take an old chair and cover it with a piece of fabric and suddenly it looked beautiful. All my teenage years were spent with her—I just watched her all the time. I adored Sally, a woman my mother’s age, who was elegant but down-to-earth all at the same time. I studied her and I imitated certain aspects of her that I really liked. I often think of Bill because he has fun everywhere he goes—even at the dump. I used to watch him talk to waitresses, talk to sales people and he always had a good time. And that’s how I learned that you have to put yourself out there and you’ll learn something or meet someone you wouldn’t have met otherwise.

What makes a movie sensual for me:For me, a sensual movie is not just about sex.There has to be some sort of connection between a couple that I can feel.If the chemistry is wrong between the actors, or if the storyline hasn’t been given the time to build up a sense of connection between them, then the movie is not sensual for me.Without these elements, it’s like jumping into bed and expecting sex without any foreplay.In addition to this basic requirement, I also need aspects that appeal to the senses.If there is great music, dancing, color, or even food, then I feel like I’ve been put in the mood for a sensual response, and that brings a sense of completeness to my reaction.

 20 Sensual Pleasures: 

MY MONTHLY MASSAGE 

A hot bath (especially after skiing) 

A perfect ski run with great snow, great weather, and a great ski buddy 

Lighting all my Swedish crystal lights 

Tea at Perennial Pleasures

 Working in my garden

 Dancing in synch with someone (especially Morris dancing) 

Hugs from people I care about, especially from my great niece, Alessandra

Colors in abundance (embroidery floss, yarn, paint, whatever)

 Rocking a baby to sleep

Having my children jump on my bed in the morning

Buying something that really pleases me

Doing watercolors, especially at Betsy's cottage in Maine

Doing anything at Betsy's cottage in Maine

Wax night at Susan's house

Getting a bikini wax 

Chai tea on Church Street

Going to bed under sheets fresh from the clothesline 

Cooking a great dinner with friends Getting emails from my daughter-in-law 

The order on these keeps changing, and lots of these in the 11 -20 range could move into the top ten in a heartbeat.